Children and Sports

I love watching my young boys play sports. That is not to say that I love ALL sports, but that I do enjoy sitting in the stands and cheering them on while they move their little bodies around the field, court, or mat. I have figured out why these events can be so enjoyable and wanted to share my epiphanies with you. Those of you who enjoy these events will probably agree with the findings.

First, there is nothing like watching a group of young ones attempt to hit a ball with a bat, or catch a ball with a large, wide, stiff leather extension on their hand. Why do we wonder why some children prefer to wear the glove on their heads? Frankly, it just feels better up there, fits better up there, and allows their hands to better grab at the bugs in the grass, pick their noses, or itch parts of their bodies that can remain nameless. Second, the child up to bat always wants to smack the ball out of the park, so for them, that means they keep their eye somewhere in the far vicinity of the park, and not on the ball ("Visualize WHERE you want the ball to go, not where it actually IS"). By the 10th attempt at young persons slow pitch, the tee is dragged from the sideline and placed in front of the humiliated child only to be swung at another few times before a connection is made. Lastly, I enjoy watching the flying ball as it either rolls between 3 players' legs before being stopped, or is hit and drops between the 3 players that are standing in a huddle attempting to catch it.

In basketball, I am currently watching my 4th grade son and his team improve and win a few tournament games. One of my favorite plays is the one where the child attempts to shoot the ball into the basket from one side of the basket only to have it totally go in an arc over to a player way on the other corner of the basket. We parents in the stands refer to this play as a "good pass." I also love watching them try to dribble the ball and walk/run, all the while maneuvering the next play and talking to their teammates. Talk about multitasking! How come this doesn't seem to work at home? There seem to be games where I find that my son is mostly on the floor sliding around, then actually running from one end of the court to the other. Maybe his feet are growing.

Lastly, there's football. The tough skills to be mastered in this game fseem to be throwing the ball, catching the ball, and the always elusive good kick. Is there much else to this sport? My kids swear that the umpires must grease and shine those balls prior to every game. It's always great fun watching them run after the ball as it bounces and rolls across the ground, first one way, then the next. Funny how they all move as a group. Because my boys are in flag football, I also like it when one child has the ball, is running, and kids are diving left and right attempting to grab at the flags. They fall like flies at the feet of the child with the ball until the child triumphantly runs into the end zone and performs a touchdown dance while all his teammates gather around. Ah, the reward for a perfectly executed play.

These are the good times. GOOD TIMES! As they get older and better, it will no longer be as humorous, just exciting or disappointing. For now, it's great entertainment. Play Ball!!!

The Solution to a Good Marriage

I have been married to Stallion for almost 11 years. We have known each other for almost 14 years. In a lifetime, I realize this is just a short amount of time, but in married years, it's an accomplishment. In the U.S., we have a tendency to just throw out those things that have a little wear or tear, are faded, or just plain don't fit us anymore. This seems to apply to people, too. Relationships that don't suit our needs, seem like too much work, or are "old" don't always work in our society. We are the society where new and shiny is better. I watch all the younger couples in school dropping their kids off and marvel at their ability to look good, drive nice vehicles, and seem to have it all together. I could get downright green with envy if I didn't know a special secret: that time is what really makes a life and relationship great.

I laugh when I think about my premarital courtship. We met at a mental institution. No, not as patients, but as staff, although I do feel there are times when we belonged there. We didn't start dating right away, but when we did, we dove right in. We broke up a couple of times during our 2 1/2 year dating period because we weren't what each other expected. He didn't expect me to always be right and I just plain thought he was always wrong. When we got to the point where we thought we were ready to be married, I thought that this was the best life had to offer and all would be right with our relationship-wrong! That first year, or three, were tough. I do remember a particular argument in which he provoked me while I was pregnant. I believe a Hoover vacuum came out of nowhere and went flying at my husband, but to this day, I am unsure who threw it (sorry honey). We questioned our feelings for each other and basically wanted to throw in the towel more than once. It's funny how TIME brings about change.

Here we are 10 years later and I am glad we stuck it out. He wears on me like a perfect-fitting soft cotton tee and jeans with just a little stretch. Sure there's some fading and wear, but they fit better than anything else in my closet and are what I always go back to when I want to be my most comfortable. Nothing but time could do that. If you are really making an effort, you grow to understand your partner. You learn when to push and when to lay off. You find yourself never really experiencing anything great unless you have shared it with your spouse. I often wish that people weren't so quick today. We talk, move, and live at the fastest pace possible, always thinking that there will be time for rest and enjoyment later. All the while, racing by what is truly important. I still think my husband is wrong most of the time, but I have just learned how to work around it and let him think he is right. My marriage has become the pivotal point in which all of my life circles around. Life is good.

Do Our Children Rule Our Lives?

It was presented to us this Sunday that people in our society idolize children. Back in the day (I figure this to be before 1960), children were meant to be seen and not heard. My father has reminded us that on a number of occasions. He has talked about how adults got together and children were then expected to find something to do on their own-quietly. They sat at a different table to eat. Parents were not expected to listen or entertain them. There were unspoken rules on behavior and you just "did" without having to be told-or else. I am not saying that this should be the way it is today, but I cannot help but wonder if we have not indeed swung in the complete opposite direction.

Let's take a case in point. My husband, Stallion. When not working the night shift, he is either 1. sleeping or 2. interacting with our children. He is a wonderful dad, but I almost see him as my children's playmate and entertainer. I will even go so far as to say that my boys' friends have asked if my husband can "come out to play." When my boys have friends sleepover, my husband is frequently asked to entertain them. He will chase them around the yard, throw the ball (whatever sport ball is in season), take them somewhere, or play video games with them. I am never asked. Perhaps it is because I am a girl, or more likely, because they know I won't. I am the one they come to for drinks, snacks, meals, and treats. If they have an injury, it's me. My husband is invited into the elite children's circle. a place I don't belong.

This has, at times, caused some issues in our relationship. I am, how shall I say it, high maintenance. I enjoy nice clothes, good food, good company, and adult time. As much as I love my children and care for their needs, I do not feel my whole being revolves around how I can provide nurturing stimulation for them. Maybe it is because of this detachment, I have noticed that today's youth (including my own) lack the boundaries that children once had. They refer to adults by their first names (Hey Jenny!) or they have no qualms about interrupting us while we are on the phone or even talking to another adult in person (hey mom?, excuse me, excuse me, mom?, mom?). They don't open doors for others, they burp at the table, or fart. They don't address others when they are spoken to, they don't know how to write a thank you note on paper, and basically, lack the social etiquette necessary to be considered appropriate. I often ponder how to allow my children to have fun, be boys, and at the same time, raise them so they become productive members of society capable of providing another human being with a fulfilling relationship. I am raising future men, after all. They will be someones boyfriend, husband, father, co-worker and I want them to experience joy in their lives.

That leads me to a possible solution. We need to introduce beginning socialization classes, or etiquette classes, into our children's lives. Not just telling them what to do, like in the past, but explaining to them WHY we do those things. Respect shown for others around us is respect shown for ourselves. Part of that is teaching them how to behave on their own, entertain themselves, and not rely on others to constantly provide for their nonessential needs. As I write this, Stallion is packing up all the supplies necessary for my boys to attend a weekend of basketball, hotel reverie, and skiing. Whoopee! I actually am looking very forward to this weekend, but I can hear my boys now if they read this- "Aw mom, you're no fun."

Starting Over

This year, I will turn 40. It doesn't happen till November 29, so it gives me plenty of time to prepare. I want you to know that this continuing of the clock to turn and get me that much closer to this age does not bother me, but instead, gives me time to think about how I want to change and what I want the beginning of life at 40 to look like. Instead of making New Year's resolutions this year, I set into my head a mantra of "Fit by 40." I keep saying it to myself to remind myself of what I want to accomplish. I will now layout for you what this means to me, and up until November 29, will let you know of my progress or digressions as the clock ticks closer.

One of my first goals, was to increase my physical activity in order to be physically fit by 40. I did not set a weight loss goal because I felt that I would feel instant failure when not getting immediate gratification, and would sink into a Culver's Concrete with cookie dough faster than my husband could turn his head so as to pretend not to see me. Let's face it, I have never been the smallest of girls. I like to refer to my body build as "athletic" and I know most of my close friends have heard me use that term. I am not sure who I am kidding with this phrase as I don't think I have been "athletic" since high school. Maybe I am referring to my strong and muscular thighs that could lift a heavy weight, or my plump bottom and large Popeye-like calves (just kidding about that last one). I certainly am not "defined," cannot run fast or for long distances, or think anyone else would consider me athletic. Well, I do have plenty of workout clothing, so there- I am athletic.

Second, I set the personal goal to read the Bible in one year. I reached this goal a couple of years back, but the life lessons in the Bible never go out of style and I find that I am better able to go about my day and my life with even just a little bit of God in my mind. A good friend provided me with a Bible meant for this exact goal, so it keeps me on track. So far, so good.

Last, I wanted to change the way I treated myself. Being a stay-at-home mom can mean many days go by of wearing your stretchy clothing with no makeup and settling for your hair up in a pony tail. I need to feel better and take more pride in my appearance, plus, I need to get rid of some small wrinkles and discoloration that has shown up as a result of aging hormones and apparently smiling too much. It would be cheaper for me to just quit smiling and laughing, but I opted for buying new products for my face and hair. Arbonne, to be exact. I wanted natural, but proven to work, so I admired some of my friends complexions, then asked them what they used. Well, Arbonne is it. Since I don't do anything half-a**, I decided to buy everything I needed to do my face first. The lesson which was conducted at my good friend E's house was informative and humbling. Who knew I was doing it all wrong? No wonder I was a mess. She will fix everything for me and I will look fab by 40 for sure. I think she thinks it's all up to me, but I will blame her anyway if I fail to follow through and don't see results that appear to be similar to those of cosmetic surgery. (just kidding E!)

I figure if I can work on all these 3 areas and get them down by 40, all life's problems will disappear and utopia will be the result. Wait, what to do with my family?

Sorry It's Been A While

Shoes ,made well, are truly an art form

Oh my! How I have neglected my writing and anyone who enjoys reading about my trials and challenges in life. Yes, a lot has happened in the last almost 2 months, and at the same time, it doesn't seem much has changed.

First, I promised to reveal what my husband got me for Christmas. Let's just say he didn't disappoint and I still think he could lead a gift-giving seminar. I will start with some pictures of the shoes and boots he gave me. First you must know that I am an absolute, hands-down, bona fide shoe LOVER! I believe that shoes are art for a ladies feet, or at least they can be. There is nothing quite like nice, painted toenails and soft feet tucked into a beautiful pair of stylish heels. That being said, I have the ugliest feet ever to have been created for women by the good Lord. I have a chubby large toe, then 3 stubby AND chubby middle toes, only to be followed lastly by a short, fat, and almost toenail-less pinky. I would say that I have the ugliest feet on the face of the planet, but my husband won that title the first time I saw his feet. If you haven't seen the blast from the past movie Waterworld with Kevin Costner, get it to just look at his feet. That is what my husbands look like (only slightly exaggerated). Wide and flat. Well, back to me. Not only can shoes be art, but also camouflage, barriers for viewing from the outside world, masks... you get the point.

A couple of times a year, I like to go through my closet and get rid of the shoes I don't feel the love for anymore. If you are a size 9 or 9 1/2 you could be the lucky recipient. Some have rarely been worn. I can choose between about 9 pairs of dressy boots, 3 pairs of casual boots, and 20 pairs of shoes in winter. Summer shoes are another blog. If anyone reading this blog is unfamiliar with Waupaca, WI let me fill you in. It is cold, slushy, snowy, and probably unfit for heels that are higher than 1 inch and made of rubber. As for me, I enjoy height. Scratch that- I NEED height. There aren't many people who go out around town with high heels on here. A friend from the South once shared that she couldn't believe the amount of cotton that was worn in the form of sweats with tennis shoes.

You might wonder where I wear these artful shoes. I have a secret. In my leisure time, I will try them on and just look at them in the mirror, admiring their color, form, or the way they turn my foot and leg into something different. They are my friends. I keep asking my husband to take me somewhere I can wear these great shoes/boots, but I guess there is only so much time and so many places one can go when you have a family the size of ours, so if you see a crazy woman wearing 4 inch heels in Walmart in the dead of winter during a snow storm, you'll know it's me and I just couldn't wait any longer. Enjoy the pictures.

Last Look Before it All Begins

The Day is finally arriving. My children couldn't be more excited and I have found myself frantically running around doing things that I have forgotten or put off till the last minute. I actually have to head to the mall today. Yikes. This year, Christmas literally sprinted up to me and now I have regrets about not enjoying the season as much as I should have. Things I jipped out on: baking, cooking, making gifts, doing crafts, spending time with friends, having a party, attending a party, going to church. That's just about everything involved with Christmas, isn't it? Things I learned this season: 1)don't take a vacation in the beginning of December, it shortens the season 2) I need to plan and start early on the crafts, probably in January 3) Not baking or cooking has allowed me to maintain the same weight, which though my weight is not ideal, at least it hasn't changed for the worse.

Included in this blog are pictures of my house because decorating is probably the only thing I did the same and on time. I hope you enjoy this last look at Christmas in my house. My decorations get taken down the couple days following Christmas.

May the holiday be all sugarplums and candy canes for anyone reading this. May it be full of wonderful memories, not the kind where people go on talk shows to share with the world. May everyone be safe when traveling and eat without guilt. Merry Christmas!

P.S. My husband went shopping yesterday and came back with bags for me! I can't wait to see what he picked out-I'll let you know. I would love to hear what others' got, too. Anyone out there?

The Tables Have Turned

Today, I am at my mothers house. She has had knee replacement surgery this week, and my husband and I thought I could help her out for a few days while she recovered. My father is still in the house, but I think it is difficult for him to take on a caregiving role right away, he needs to have an adjustment period where he can acclimated to what is expected of him. In other words, my mother is not the best patient.

My father and I picked her up at the hospital and she was waiting on the side of the bed ready to go. She was a stellar patient in the hospital, doing her exercises, taking her medications, and hardly ringing the call bell at all. She insisted upon our arrival to the hospital that we go directly to Sam's Club to get some groceries-was she serious? She was. She had taken a pain med and was ready to take on the world. Instead, she took on Sam's, motoring around on one of those electronic carts and terrorizing the other customers. She wasn't heeding the warning not to drive around under the influence. Everyone survived and we made it home.

Today, she insisted on getting up her stairs to take a shower. Dad didn't like the idea, I was not sure. She won. It went well, but afterwards when she wanted to spend time on her computer, I put my foot down and insisted she take on the role of patient-what was I doing here anyway? She complied like a normal stellar patient would.

Taking care of my mom is a privilege and honor. After all the years of having been cared for by she and my dad, it is nice to return just a fraction of that favor back. It's also been nice having some time caretaking that doesn't involve diapers........well,yet anyway. I love you mom.

Overcoming My Obsessiveness With Germs

I never really liked dirt, even as a little girl. My
mother would say that I wore dresses and tights
and didn't really like to play in or touch the dirt. I was what you would call a girly-girl. As I got older, I did remain clean, just not very neat. As a teen, I grew up in a Victorian home full of beautiful things, but you couldn't see anything under the heap of clothes, shoes, stuffed animals, and bedding in my room. When I ventured out on my own as an adult, I became a clean and neat freak. My mom told me that she was worried when I was a teen that I would never outgrow that messy phase. She's proud at how I turned it around. To this day, I remain a little bit of a clean/neat freak. With all my boys, it's hard to entertain my obsessive tendencies towards having everything being tour-ready in my home. I also am unable to control the level at which my children subject themselves to our world and all its germs, bacteria, and viruses. Stallion will often jest with me that I can't keep my boys in a bubble, so I need to let it go. I have, but can still get shocked, like when my kids put candy that was on the floor in their mouths. Or the time one of them took a piece of ABC gum from who-knows-where and stuck it in their pie-hole. At these times, I feel like having them swish with bleach but as a nurse, am aware of the problems that this would cause. I will then settle for a good mouth brushing, then observing them for symptoms of what just HAD to be carried on that yummy find.



On our recent trip to Gatlinburg, Noah (that's him above), tested my germphobia. We were walking down the main street when I all of a sudden heard my husband cry out, "No Noah Don't!" From then on, everything was in slow motion. I turned and said "WHAAAAAT HAAAAPPEEENED?" Stallion said,"You dooooon't waaaaan't to knoooooow." I then turned to Noah and my mouth dropped. In his mouth was a whole new set of those goofy plastic teeth that kids wear on Halloween. He was happy as a lark. I was grossed out and thinking how long it would be before I could safely kiss him again. I also thought that he would need careful observation to make sure his face or body didn't respond to some crazy microbe. Well, he lived and didn't even get sick. Thank goodness for small favors. The lesson is: kids and germs go together and sometimes we just need to let it go a little. I kissed him that same day.

Gifts From My Man-"Stallion"

Alright, I will admit it: I LOVE getting presents. I like to pretend to myself that presents aren't important and that I don't need anything (which I don't), but I truly love receiving gifts. Sometimes it's hard for me to contain my excitement upon the receiving of these gifts. I will do the following: save my gifts to open for last in order to keep the anticipation high, smile from ear to ear and maybe giggle to myself, or stare wide-eyed at package and touch it periodically to make sure that it still exists. After it is opened, I also have to contain my thanks to the giver lest they feel like they are being accosted or are likely to experience great bodily harm. Often, I will just give a big smile, say thanks, then secretly look forward to the person leaving so I can ponder the gift.

My husband is one of the best gift-givers I have ever known. I have often expressed to him that he should offer classes to those husbands that have difficulty deciphering from her chatter what she would love and who seem to have a hard time finding their wife's gift. Every Christmas I will find boxes placed at the last minute under the tree that are for me from him. I can't wait. One year, he suggested we not buy for each other. This idea was shot down faster than a duck during hunting season. I explained how I looked forward to what he chose and every time I looked at the item, or wore it, I thought of him and his care in picking something out for me. Sometimes, those gifts are beautiful clothes that I would never buy myself because I am too cheap, or jewelry that again, I could never see spending the money on. The point is: he listens. I have found that I actually have to be careful what I say sometimes or I might receive that gift of the Chia herb garden that I mentioned I was curious about.

My friends are at times envious at my husbands gift-giving expertise. One has also made the mistake of verbalizing out loud that her husband should take lessons from Stallion (yes Tina, that's you). I honestly feel that the lesson to be learned is to listen. Giving that great gift is all about picking up little cues and looking at the person it is intended for. Gifts are definitely not what this season is about, but boy oh boy I can't wait to get mine from Heath. I'll get back to you on what it is.

Family Vacation to Gatlinburg, Tennessee-Yippee!

Our family usually enjoys traveling the end of October, but once we heard about the winter celebration in Gatlinburg, we decided to travel the beginning of December to this getaway in the Smokies. Gatlinburg is about 13 hours away, and yes, we drove it. This was an experience in itself, but we'll save that for another post. Gatlinburg reminds me of Wisconsin Dells for those of you live in this wonderful state and have been there. While Gatlinburg is nicely nestled at the foot of the Smokies, it has been turned into a tourist town with plenty of fudge and old-time photo shops. I absolutely loved our resort (the Westgate Smokey Mountain Resort) and loved the mountains. Hiking was a true delight and the waterfalls were phenomenal. I highly recommend taking the drive that transverses the mountain range into North Carolina for great picture taking and views. Restaurants were plenty and satisfied all tastes, and of course, Ripley's has taken over a good deal of the entertainment choices, so you can see their many different attractions.

Do I recommend this trip? Well, sort of. The mountains are SO majestic that it is hard not to fall in love with the area immediately and think that you could live there off the land like they did on Little House on the Prairie, but in reality, I am a small-city girl and would never be happy like that. Time with the family is never a waste, even if we sometimes feel like referees during Friday Night Smackdown. Vacations also make you appreciate the comforts of your home and the friends you left behind. Hearts grow fonder for all things home.

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!

O.K. So I haven't written for a while. Let's see-Thanksgiving, then Black Friday, then a family trip to Gatlinburg, Tennessee, then all the usual tasks for the holidays-whew! I have been busy, as I am sure anyone reading this has been, too. I just love this time of year, but Christmas always comes and goes way too fast for me. Once the shopping is done, you truly get to enjoy the meaning of this holiday, then it is here and gone. Being a Christian, my family and I really try to grasp the true meaning of the day, Dec. 25- Christmas. We read the stories from the Bible, we talk about what we can do for others, and we look for ways to give. And although we try to get away from all the commercialism, it cannot be helped to talk about what the boys would wish for if they could have anything.

This year, because we were on vacation, we missed the school Christmas concert. I cannot say as I regretted this. While I love watching little children perform (especially when they perform things while they don't think they're being watched), and I can really appreciate all the hard work that the teachers have to do to put this together, I do not miss the parking fiasco, finding a seat on the hard bleachers, or trying to be comfortable in a hot and sweaty gym. Bless the teachers.

I also don't feel the love of the season on Black Friday. Maybe that's why I choose not to fight the huge crowds at our closest mall, but instead only go to a couple stores that are in the opposite direction with my husband. You can find us performing our breathing exercises in the car before we head out on this venture. It definitely takes a certain mindset, doesn't it? If anyone is reading this and cares to share a great story about Black Friday, I would love to read it.

Lastly, I can't help but feel a little saddened by all the arguing that seems to go on as to whether we should celebrate Christmas in the schools, call a Christmas tree a holiday tree, or be allowed to display Nativity scenes in front of public buildings. The only opinion I will give is this: December 25 was the day picked to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ on this earth. What has happened since, has been a result of business and people warping the day into something else that serves a different purpose. I have no problem with non-Christian's picking a different day to celebrate this season if they want to eliminate the "Christ" from everything, but Christmas Day is Christmas Day and cannot be something else. It is HIS birthday celebration-like we each have our birthdays and corresponding celebrations. Our family usually bakes some form of cake in order to celebrate and sing, just like we would on our special birth day. Well, there it is from my lips. I DO wish everyone a wonderful holiday season-Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, merry Kwanzaa! I love you all.

Holidays on a Budget

This time of year it's easy to get caught up in the shopping and spending, ignoring the credit card balance and hoping it will go away until spring. Due to a work injury, my husband has been out of work for almost two months. This has forced me to do some serious cutting back. I am spending less on gifts and trying to enjoy the season without all the 'stuff'. Here are a few ideas for putting more joy in the holiday and less cash:

- Check out some Christmas movies from the library and watch them as a family
- Light a candle and enjoy a good cup of coffee
- Enjoy family time around the fire playing games or singing carols
- Bake a batch of Christmas cookies before you have to, just for fun!
- Listen to Christmas music in the car
- Take a few minutes each day to count your blessings, and be thankful for that baby born in the manger
- Give homemade food gifts, not many of us need more stuff
- Send a handwritten card to a friend, reminding them of why you cherish their friendship
- Take the family for a walk or ride to look at Christmas lights
- Get out the good dishes for the family, even if it's just chili night

I hope this season will be one of special times with friends and family. Remember, it's all about relationships. God's blessings on you and yours.

More on New York City and Children

I feel that my children live a pampered life compared to many others in the world. While we don't have too much money, we do have heat, food, electricity, clothes, clean water, and all the other necessities. We also have many non-essentials such as a Wii, 3 televisions, a Nintendo DS, every Hot Wheel ever made, every action figure known to the younger generation, and all forms of building blocks. You get the idea.

We arrive in New York late at night because our plane was delayed. We are all tired by the time we reach our hotel. Uh-hem, Hostel. We check in and find out we are on the 4th floor and we have to all pile into a tiny elevator that moves at the speed of a snail. We step off the elevator onto a floor that I can only say looked like somebody threw up raspberry sherbet all over the walls. I tell the kids we will be fine and this will be an adventure, then we head to our room. Once the door is open, all of us start looking for the light switch. About 3 minutes later, I notice something hanging from the ceiling. It is a piece of string to which I then pull and the only light in the room comes on. Maybe we should have just kept the light off. My middle child, being the pampered middle that he is, exclaims "what is THAT about? This room doesn't even have a switch?" I then explain to him that this is still a common observance in some parts of the world and we will survive pulling the string. Well, the hostel didn't have bugs, or rats, but there was a bird in the room next door and we weren't sure if it was the occupants' or one that had taken residence from the outside. We shared an interesting experience sleeping in this different form of a hotel and we know we will laugh about those raspberry walls for years to come.

Wanted: Interior Decorator for the Candy Hotel/Hostel in NYC

P.S. I would have taken a picture but have to admit, I didn't want others to see where we had been willing to stay to save a few bucks.

Mixed Feelings in An Aging Mother

I realized I haven't poured out my thoughts in a few days. I am having mixed feelings this morning over two issues. One, my body is not functioning like it used to and I am disappointed in this fact. I turn 39 in a couple of weeks and my mind still feels SO young, but today, I went to exercise and my back feels like that of a hunched 100 year old. You know, my mom used to talk about this when I was in my teen years and early 20's and I used to think, "is THIS all they have to talk about-aching bodies, sick friends, body functions not functioning?" For some reason, I now feel justified to talk about the same and talk about it with everyone, mind you.


Second, I am a little sad today because I sent my youngest boy (age 3) off to school for morning classes. In our language-rich home environment he has not flourished and needs help with speech and development related to that area. This creates in me some mixed feelings: he is SO young and I don't feel like he should need to start "learning" quite yet, but I also want him to be at the same levels of development as others his age, and apparently, he is not getting the necessary tools at home. Maybe my sadness is just a realization that there are no others to cling to my leg, cry for more juice, or screech for a snack every 10 minutes. I need to develop other interests. Maybe this is a good time to set aside for my "job" of blogging. I could also get back in the routine of exercise. I could read, get organized, cook food, bake, clean house, email friends, make phone calls-the list is endless!!! Sometimes the joy in what could be a sad occasion, comes from thinking about all the possibilities of what could be. Maybe I'll finally get my floors clean. Maybe tomorrow.

I'm Having A Moment

Excuse me, but aren't we Moms allowed to have a 'moment'? Let me explain, recently my 15 year old daughter completed and passed her driver's education class. She is counting the days (35) until she can apply for her temps. She also informed us that a young man at school would like to take her out. Can't I get over one moment before she springs another on me? I mean, I am to young for this to be happening, right? My first born learning to drive... now wanting to date. How can this happen so fast?

I would grin and bear it when older moms would say 'enjoy this time, they grow up so fast' (as I've got 2 kids holding my legs and one squalling in my arms while the 4th one is playing in the street). It sure didn't feel like they were growing up fast! Then, all of a sudden you turn around and it's happened, they've grown up. I'm not one to get too sentimental, but really, driving.. dating, how can this be?

So there you have it, my moments. Enjoy them while you've got them.

Let the Basement Remodel Begin!

First, I must apologize for the blurry pictures, but you get the point. Our basement is in the middle of demolition. This room started out as a dank dark blue paneled room with outdoor carpeting and tiny windows. The goal: to turn it into a place my man can enjoy and the children can play and have large slumber parties. This is a lofty goal on a limited budget, but we are always up for a challenge. Since these pictures were taken, my husband has proceeded to take a concrete saw and enlarge the 3 tiny windows to fit nice-sized sliders so that the children and guests might actually have a chance to escape in case of fire. He has also, in his eagerness, carved out a 4th window (guess he really liked using that saw) that will even out the numbers on each wall. I love to watch rooms transform into usable updated spaces, and especially like to see it done on a budget. It provides inspiration to those of us who are unable to afford professional decorators. Look forward to updates on how this is coming along. I know I can't wait to see the finished product.

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Submission in a Marriage?-What Does THAT mean?

Submission. Even saying the word in my head does not bode well. It feels almost "icky" and makes me scrunch my face. Why is that? The dictionary definition refers to submission as giving up, or surrendering. It is the condition of being humble or obedient. As I am a visual learner, all I can conjure up are my dogs trying to let each other know who's boss by mounting or nipping and growling. This doesn't spark warm fuzzies, or thoughts of sugarplums and candy canes. According to the Bible, wives are to submit to their husbands. I had to wonder, was God kidding?

At the beginning of my marriage, as in most peoples marriages that I have spoken to, there seems to be a period of turmoil before there is a settling down. I remember a particularly tumultuous time where I believe my Hoover was kicked down the stairs at my angry, but unsuspecting husband much to his dismay and my own, at the knee-jerk reflex I was capable of. Mind you, I was pregnant at the time and incapable of much self-control when really upset. Soon after, I realized something would have to change if we were to succeed in this marriage and although I really wanted to think that it would have to be my husband, I was smart enough to realize that it had to start with me. He also wasn't being very receptive to my constructive suggestions about the flaws he should work on.

While watching TV one afternoon, a segment came on that was featuring a female writer that had written a book on surrendering in your marriage. I am sure the title is similar to that, but I am unsure as I write this. I knew I had to read it and ordered it soon after. It began the change in me. Often, I challenge my "stallion," especially because he likes to run free and wild with his mouth and often say things like "I command you" when he is jesting with me. He knows it gets my fur up and claws out and I will often respond with something G-rated (of course) like "no one COMMANDS me." I am wrong, though. We are commanded every day in life. I took an oath when I said my vows that binds me to, among other things, consider my husband above others and to listen, assist, and stay with him through the good, bad, and dirty-diapery. I need to accept his leadership and believe in him, while being free to offer to him my opinions and feelings on a matter. Through the years, I have come to depend on him. He does not fail me, and ultimately, I am entrusted to him for him to care for for the rest of our lives. If I believe in him, trust him, and understand the part I play in our marriage to make it a wonderful and joyous part of life, I must submit. This is not to say that I roll over and allow him to bite and nip me (notice what I left out), but that I understand the dynamics of our relationship and have a responsibility to do my part to make it work.

Others have mastered submission in marriage more so than myself. For me, it is a struggle to balance my strength and my pride with my ability to submit. The joy, I have to remind myself, is in the journey that life brings us on. Growth doesn't happen overnight, and for me, can sometimes take decades. More on this later. Woof woof!

Only in the Midwest

I love the way the people in the Midwest set their own rules. We run wild and free, most of us owning a house and land, or even just a plot of land. We take pride in our land and will defend it against those who would criticize the way we use it. Even when we are in an "urban" setting (a town considered incorporated), we choose to use our property in unique ways. I have seen full gardens, nick knacks all over, shadow people and animals lingering by many a fence, fake animals tromping through a front yard or sipping from a man made pond. Today, I saw a popular sport being played out in the front of our neighbors' yard within the city limits that could only be tolerated in the Midwest.

After playing at the local playground with all our children, we drove by our neighborhood church, then to our surprise, witnessed the corner home occupants hanging their latest deer kill from a tree. I cringed slightly, not because I am opposed to deer hunting, but because they then proceeded to gut the deer and remove the vital parts and spill them on the front lawn. "Kids, look at that. You should go down there and watch after we park the car," says my husband. Yeah, right. I wanted to take a picture to prove that it actually was happening in our quiet neighborhood, but thought that tacky and probably not appropriate for some of our readers. Where else could my children get such an accurate animal anatomy lesson from the comfort of our own vehicle? Only in the Midwest. Can you imagine what would happen if you lived in a high rise condo and suddenly saw a bloody carcass smack your window from the condo above? Heavens would that create a fuss. Bless Wisconsin and the freedoms we enjoy.

How I Met My Man-"Stallion"

At this time of Thanksgiving, I wanted to give special thanks for my great man-"stallion." We have been together almost 15 years now and it only gets better each year. Actually, it only gets more comfortable, like a great chenille chair with down cushions. He is my best friend and the one who if I HAD to pick one person that I was forced to spend all my time with-it would be him. We, of course, wouldn't always get along and I would do most of the talking, but he would be the person, nonetheless.



I love for people to share how they met their beloved, so for those of you who don't already know or want to hear it again, I will share how my husband and I came to get together. Our first date was on my birthday, which is coming up in a couple of weeks (I'll be 25 again!). I had just moved to Oshkosh after finishing nursing school and was looking for a house or condo to purchase. I ended up in my mans condo with the realtor when the realtor stated, "You would be a good match for the young man who lives here." My man was not in the condo at the time and when I left the viewing, he was down the block walking his dog and I could only see his back. I did not buy the condo and thought nothing else of it. I was a psychiatric nurse and wanted to work at the state mental hospital in Winnebago. I applied, was accepted, and wound up on the same unit as my man (there were 13 units at the hospital at that time, and no, he was not a patient). We worked together, and as he would exclaim to anyone who will listen, I eventually asked him out. The rest is full of the usual highs and lows with the end result being a long marriage and many boys. Life is good.



I love the story of how we found each other and it instills in me the belief that we are truly matched and were meant to be together. Of course, I need to remind myself of this everytime he decides to be a little lippy with me. So, I would like to start out the season of Thanksgiving by being thankful for my spouse. The joy I find in the comfort of having him is indescribable and such a blessing. I would love to hear other stories of how people met. Write and let me know!